I’m not as young as I used to be
grey matters getting pretty grey
an absent minded off duty officer
was it just the other day
that I lost my gun
fully loaded, misplaced
but please don’t tell anyone
I must save face
it’s getting time to retire
still have six months to go
and I lost my gun

My neighbour was a drug addict
I looked the other way
thinking everyone’s human
thinking who am I to say
see her in the elevator
tell her: please don’t apologize
don’t feel guilty for your weakness
don’t believe those kind of lies
then I catch myself, am silent
wish I could say you’re not the only one
but I don’t, I’m too embarrassed
I lost my gun

Sergeant called me into his office
I’m so nervous I can’t even sweat
but it’s only to talk about pension
just to make sure that I don’t forget
that I’m leaving soon
that I’ve served the badge well
what he doesn’t know
I will never tell
It was three months ago
I lost my gun

Dignity is like a promise
you truly mean it until it breaks
and then to hold yourself together
you do whatever it takes
again in the elevator
sure is rough you’re feeling sick
I’m not some cop who doesn’t listen
yes, I believe you’re going to kick
mindless dishonest flirting
the kind that doesn’t lead to more
we’re both adults so who’s it hurting
we both get off on the same floor
there’s some dealer she owes money
she doesn’t have it so she’ll run
might be the last time I’ll ever see her
I lost my gun
you’re not the only one, you’re not the only one
you’re not the only one
I lost my gun

And then at the retirement party
time to hand in my badge and piece
I apologize, left it at home
spoken with terror and relief
but they just all laugh
they don’t suspect
don’t even glimpse my shame
incompetence or neglect
and then my pension comes
and I lost my gun